As we gradually move towards something that resembles ‘business as usual’ in our schools, we will be continuing to face a number of challenges with anxious and attention needing children. Some, we will expect to need extra resources and time. However, some will crop up unexpectedly. This may be due to an adverse childhood experience (ACE) that was experienced during lockdown, from heightened anxiety levels or from seemingly nowhere. Either way, planning a ‘just in case’ scenario is always worthwhile. It’s better to have a plan that is not needed as opposed to no plan (resulting in a situation that wasn’t resolved in the best way it could have been).

All the points on the Infographic are outlined in much greater depth in this blog post – please don’t download the infographic without reading the blog. If you use the infographic at school, please also direct staff to the post – Thanks!

For the purpose of this blog , I have developed the character ‘Kai’ to illustrate these areas. Kai could be male or female and is also an acronym for ‘kindness and intuition.’ These are traits needed for supporting children with behaviours that challenge. The intuition comes with experience; the more children you meet and the more you research and read, the more intuitive your practice. You’ll also have more tools in your toolbox. Furthermore, intuitiveness should help to reduce your stress levels! You may have met a child similar to Kai:

‘Kai is eight years old and loves LOL dolls. She is great at art and painting. She is also highly anxious which sometimes comes out as challenging behaviour. She has low self-esteem and is desperate to please and be liked. Socially, Kai wants to play but her actions are often misinterpreted and she can become upset.’

How would you help her to achieve? The aim is to stop the cycle of negativity that your Kai has towards themselves. As well as any negativity you or your staff may have towards Kai (albeit on a subconscious level), as it is very easy to fall into that pattern – as Paul Dix illustrates here:

‘ As a classroom teacher, you are continually having to fight the urge to respond intuitively. There are times when we all want to scream, ‘Just do your bloody work’. If that actually worked, this book would end here and I would have to go and find a proper job. But it doesn’t work, regardless of how many times you say it or how loudly you scream it. Believe me, we have all tried.’

Paul Dix ‘When the adults change, everything changes’ – read this book – link at the bottom!

With more practise, hopefully your ‘intuitive’ response won’t be like the one in Paul’s example!

In this post and for pronoun simplicity, Kai identifies as female. I hope that having a named child within the post and infographic will support you in applying the information and ideas to your own ‘Kai’. With good planning and system in place, your Kai’s journey back to effective learning will hopefully be fast and successful!

The following are both ideas to try and areas to rule out. The aim being, to provide schools with a concrete starting point to work from.

Possible SEND needs:

SLCN: Firstly, does Kai have a speech, language and communication need? – It’s really important to rule this out. If a language processing issue is found, this might be the reason behind challenging behaviours. Kai may literally have very little idea what she is being asked to do and may become frustrated. Sometimes children have these issues even when they appear to understand; perhaps nodding in agreement alongside either a blank or engaged look. If possible screen all of your new intake for speech, language and communication needs or at the very least anyone that is not progressing. There can often be a few children who present with issues that you would not normally have spotted particularly if the area is around language and processing. If an issue does arise, ensure the whole school staff are aware as this will affect how we interact and talk to Kai. Adults working with her can have key visuals on a lanyard to help with desired behaviours (see communication in print). Some whole school training is advisable to support children with SLCN needs. The strategies that work for these children, also work for all children so win win!

Does Kai have an underlying SEND need? – Discuss with your SENCO to see if there is anything else going on. Rule out hearing and vision issues; both issues that could frustrate and potentially lead to challenging behaviour. Educational Psychologist and Specialist Teacher involvement would also be helpful in order to get a better idea of any underlying causes and suggest ideas. A parental trip to the GP is worthwhile (perhaps with a cover letter from your SENCO outlining observed behaviours), in order to enlist a pediatrician to see if there are potential needs such as ADHD/ADD/ASD/Sensory etc. Even if there is nothing that require a diagnosis, it may be that Kai needs to be placed on your SEND register for SEMH (Social, Emotional and Mental Health), as this is an underlying cause of behaviours that challenge. Often in a school the behaviour lead and the SENCO are different people, sometimes with differing views on how to move forward to support Kai best! However, the more people fighting for her (perhaps with some healthy debate along the way), the better.

Further ideas

A diary to identify triggers and peak times – If you can spot emerging patterns is Kai’s day (e.g. just before home time or half way through a lesson when a brain break is needed), you can start to unpick the reasoning behind the behaviours seen, as well as plan ahead to prevent them before they start. Read on for further ideas for prevention.

Home school communication – Regular discussions with parents and a home school communication book is of paramount importance so that everybody is sharing information about Kai’s day. It can be used to record positives as well as any ‘wobbles’. Are there any recent issues at home which have not been shared? Hopefully not if this book is in place! Often parents know what sort of day Kai will have within the first 5 minutes of her waking up. It’s helpful if school know this as well! The more positives that can be identified the better. This supports parents who might otherwise feel that you only call or communicate with bad news and also develops relationships between home, school and Kai.  

Rapport – Get to know the Kai as a person and understand her strengths, triggers, likes and dislikes. If you invest time in her, she is more likely to want to communicate or cooperate with you. ‘Hold her in mind’ (attachment theory), by telling her that you saw something at the weekend that made you think of her. Give her a special job or area of responsibility (see points below). Enjoy some friendly banter and a joke and be ready with activities linked to her hobbies if she needs a calming activity. This leads on to…

Key adult/ learning mentor – Kai may wish to choose the adult that she gels best with to check in with her as a ‘light touch’ a few times a day. This can make a huge difference and really helps to build the rapport in the last point. Kai can go to this adult for support and to discuss any situations that arise (after she is calm) and her key adult could be the person to communicate with parents. It is useful for only one or two people to do the parental communication to avoid mixed messages.

Make a plan – Plan for wobbles and put together a box or list of calming activities such as sensory putty or something linked to Kai’s love of LOL dolls. If Kai has particular ASD needs, she may need to do some ‘heavy work’ such as digging or stacking chairs to support her proprioception (body awareness) and vestibular (balance) needs. It may take some trial and error to get the right range of activities to diffuse the situation. The ultimate aim is for her to take part in class more and stay out of class less. It is a fine balancing act in reducing/removing anxiety and triggers against asking her to take part in learning for longer periods. This will need regular review. It would be helpful to have a support plan in place which officially identifies triggers, strengths etc. which can be annotated and shared with all adults working with her. It may be that her needs do not fit with the school behaviour system and this can be recorded here so all adults know how to support her. She also needs a child friendly version to refer to with her own set of class rules to look back at (or a simplified version which could include pictures of her showing desired behaviours).  

Act quickly – As soon as you spot that a situation is about to arise, find her an errand to run. It can be anything! Pre arrange with another teacher to expect Kai to come visiting or send her for a run round the field or make an indoor/outdoor trail to follow (she could help design it). Hopefully she will come back refreshed and ready to have another try.

Learning activities – Employ all of those QFT strategies that you normally would: differentiate, scaffold, clear instructions, time limits, brain breaks etc. It may be that you need to build up difficulty even if she is academically where she should be for her age, she may not be emotionally able to complete the tasks. Build up growth mindset by starting with tasks that will be easy and provide praise for successful completion.

Proud book – Record anything good in a proud book that can be shared at home as well. Include work, quotes from staff, certificates, photos, post its with good moments recorded as well as any times she has successfully self-regulated (or self-regulated with support). Bring out the book at wobbly moments to remind Kai of all the positives and progress she has made. This will really help her self-esteem which may be low.

Responsibilities  – As was mentioned in the rapport section, can you find something around school for Kai to be responsible for? Ideas include: supporting the site manager with duties or the ICT technician. Perhaps she can check all the Ipads come back to a central point at the end of the day? One idea I heard of for a child who was not popular, was that the kitchen staff supported him in making cakes for his peers. Popularity and self-esteem went up and important skills were learnt. Also with a non-teaching adult, Kai will have an extra role model and also a ‘non-academic’ job for her to do which she may look forward to each week and of course, get praise for completing well

Whole school approaches

Consistency – A whole school approach is important so that everyone is aware how to react and talk to Kai (and other children with similar needs) at all times. Ensure all adults are on the same page by documenting and sharing possible triggers. There may be an increased number of adults working with the child in comparison to usual at the moment which adds an extra challenge. Keep a record of incidents. Also, all children with behaviours that challenge could have a one page profile to be shared with all staff.

Curriculum – Extra circle time and PHSE sessions will help support the individual and their class. It will promote whole group empathy for the child with the difficulty. Also embedding a whole school system such as Zones of Regulation or The Incredible 5 Point Scale.

Language – Train staff on positive language and the language of choice, they may need some ‘scripts’ to help support their own management of challenging behaviour. Remember to focus on the behaviour that you don’t like, not that you don’t like the child. Simple SLCN question ideas could be included for Teacher/LSA/MDA training and staff could have helpful phrases on their lanyards.

And finally….

Enlist support – Remember your own wellbeing. It is tiring to support children who need extra help to self-regulate and you may wish to talk over strategies with a colleague as well as have someone on hand to help support you or your class if your time is being taken up with Kai’s needs.

Thanks for reading,

You may also like: https://positiveyoungmind.com/10-de-escalation-techniques-with-social-distancing-in-mind/

Comments as always, welcomed below.

Lynn