Even the most empathetic staff members, who are full of inclusive practices, can come unstuck when faced with a child in front of them who has reached crisis point.
With recent levels of heightened anxiety in some children (perhaps caused by a change in routine and environment), some may find it harder than usual to feel safe and secure at school. This may result in some challenging situations requiring de-escalation.
The techniques of de-escalation are particularly needed now. Here are some techniques which will hopefully be useful in both prevention and managing a child who has reached the edge of their window of tolerance.
Here are my 10 go to strategies for de-escalation.
1. Prevention (consistency) – There may be lots of different adults working with a child who is sensitive to transitions in comparison to the usual number. Consistency during this period is a challenge. Staff need to be on the same page with the best way to support individuals with these additional needs. Ensure all staff working with the child are familiar with individual triggers and procedures. They need to be documented and shared. Their usual resources, including brain break activities and a safe space, should be available. Incidents also need recording in order to spot patterns and add to SEND records.
2. More prevention (Curriculum) – Extra circle time and PHSE sessions may also help support the pupil in question. These lessons will promote whole group empathy for the child with the difficulty. Hopefully this will also go some way towards prevention of other children engaging in provocation.
2. Even more prevention (signs) – Look out for signs that a child may be becoming unsettled and direct them to a safe space where they can take some time to return to a calm state. Signs could include balled fists, agitation, pacing, shouting etc. Check and add to the child’s profile for a list that is personal to them.
3. Go on a trail – Can the situation be diffused? Draw chalk markings on the playground or electrical tape trails around the school for this purpose. Movement and physical activity can help de-stress individuals. The child could help design their own. Sometimes some fresh air and a run around does wonders. Timetable physical brain breaks throughout the day. Even if it’s raining get them outside (ensure they bring a suitable coat!).
4. Calm voice and stance – However you are feeling inside, don’t let it show and maintain a serene demeanour. Generally, how you say something is more important than what you are saying when you are de-escalating a situation. Keep sentences simple and brief. Body language is equally important; maintain a non-threatening stance.
5. Wait until calm – If a child is in an agitated state (outside their window of tolerance), wait until they have calmed down before talking over any issues. You won’t be able to discuss any contributing factors until the child is calm. Once discussed, fill in an action plan (point 8) and the child can return to the group.
6. Wording – Use words and phrases that de-escalate and give the child the opportunity to follow your instruction. Phrases include:
- Let’s try…
- It seems like…
- Maybe we can…
- I wonder if…
7. Distraction – This is an instrumental tool in your toolkit given the current situation. Especially if you can’t use your usual techniques as effectively due to social distancing constraints. If you can distract them with something such as lego, then they may be able to calm down enough to have a dialogue with you. Find out your pupil’s favourite things or topics and have resources ready.
6. Action plan – Develop an action plan with the child complete before returning to the group. A now and next board may be useful for this. For example: Now -I am going to have 5 more minutes in my safe space; Next – I will talk to Megan to explain to her that I don’t like it when she takes my pencil case; Then – I will return to my class. Adult support may be needed for each step.
7. Use humour – This is dependent on the individual child but can work well and fast when de-escalation is needed. Is there an inanimate object such as a lunch box that has suddenly developed a name and personality and is conversing with the child? Remember to avoid sarcasm! This is my favourite technique when it works and the possibilities are endless. With some children, it won’t work.
8. Remove the other children – It is always preferable to remove the rest of the class rather than the child. Although logistically challenging, it is easier to maintain social distancing this way. You may need to prepare another area in advance for the class to go. Ensure you are in an area where the child is not backed into a corner.
9. Get more support – Do you have a person who is on call to support with de-escalation? It might be you! Either way, a second person is best to both support and maintain outward calm. You also both have witnesses that your school’s social distancing procedures are maintained. Furthermore, it’s less lonely than trying to support a child in need on your own!
10. Involve parents – It is good practice to have regular communication with parents with a home school communication book. Noting down positives about the day, sharing good work and hiccups. This will help home and school work together, especially with the increased number of adults. Phoning parents is always going to be a last resort but may on occasions be necessary, even if it’s just to let them know the child is having a wobbly moment. With any luck, you can call back in half an hour to say they are back in class and fine. A part time timetable may also be appropriate for individual children to support their transition back.
Health warning – Supporting children who display heightened anxiety is tiring, so make sure you have the opportunity to talk over strategies or particular incidents with someone if needed.
Every situation and child is different and I have been pleasantly surprised to see some children thrive in this new way of working despite having previous difficulties. They are enjoying working in smaller groups and a higher ratio of staff can support SEMH needs as they arise.
Thanks for reading. Remember to download the infographic for your staff and enlarge to A3 for your staff room (or somewhere else if your staff room is currently closed!). Further ideas and resources can be found at:
https://www.tes.com/news/de-escalating-behaviour-8-tips-teachers
Lynn How